In my discussions with chief executives and leaders, specifically about advice they get both internally and externally, a pattern of frustration emerges relatively quickly. These are the most frequently mentioned frustration-inducing behaviors.
- Suggesting more ideas and concepts than can possibly be achieved or even considered. Remember that the most important reason CEOs lose jobs relates to failing to prepare adequately. If your methodology is to suggest new ways of doing things or simply new things to do, you would be well advised to focus more on what needs to get done and what is yet to be completed rather than putting even one or two new ideas on the boss’s desk.
- Engaging in time-wasting and nonspecific (purposeless) conversations. Even if it is the boss who brings up vacations, the family, or other chitchat topics, your role as the Trusted Strategic Advisor is to keep these encounters focused on what truly matters and get things done. Yes, it is true that over time you will develop a relationship where a lot of personal information is known and seems appropriate to discuss, but my advice remains in force: keep these meetings and encounters as directed and professional as possible. Keep your actual role very clear at all times.
- Offering information that is late or incomplete, with some key facts and data or interpretations apparently being purposely withheld. Senior executives already know that the information they get is filtered, detoxified, and often pretty harmless. One of your most important currencies is candor, the important, concise, prompt disclosure of things you know that the boss should know. Information withheld or that is late for whatever reason reflects on the trust in your relationship. If there are even two or three incidents where your boss is left with the feeling that you are failing to be forthcoming, you will see your invitations decline.
- Offering information that is already known or that could be thought up independently. Stick to what matters. If you know that your boss already knows, move on. Count on it: you are wasting his or her time. Avoid doing that or risk losing a good part of your relationship.
- Giving only partial input, apparently on the assumption that the boss knows more, or should know more, than he or she does. There is a way to structure giving advice using options. This was designed to prevent providing only partial information. To avoid leaving out key information, talk in terms of timelines or priorities; state what should be done first, second, third, or apply a calendar or a clock to the information you have to share. This way, even things the boss already knows are put in a useful, more strategic context.
- Being less than candid. This behavior is a relationship killer. Whether a product of fear, lack of preparation, or simply timidity, lack of candor is the fastest way to become disemployed as an advisor. Better to succeed at less than fail unforgettably and live another day.
- If you want to be there, be ready, be actively engaged, and tell the whole truth promptly. It’s always that nagging, bothersome question that gets you in the end. It’s when the boss looks up at you and asks, “Did you know this was going to happen?” and you know you did.
The problem with all of these behaviors is that they irritate top executives and erect barriers to their taking your advice or taking you seriously.
*©2006-2025, James E. Lukaszewski, “Why Should the Boss Listen to You, The Seven Disciplines of the Trusted Strategic Advisor, pages 38-39,” Josey Bass. Contact the copyright holder at jel@e911.com for information and reproduction permissions. Editing or excerpting forbidden.
